I trust Him, I trust Him not…


lovemelovemenot.jpgAs I walked up from the beach today, I overheard a conversation between a couple.  I had noticed them as I trekked upwards: he was kinda looking off into the distance appearing really apathetic and she was staring at him almost longingly.  As I walked past them, and in between my own gasps for breath, I heard her pleading with him, “If only you would let yourself trust me…”.  I wasn’t able to hear his response.  I decided stopping and staring would not only be blatantly obvious, but also extremely rude (yes, I can monitor myself at times!).  But, I find it hard to believe he really had anything to say in response to that.  I mean, really, what is there to say?

Instantly I started analyzing relationships.  I felt frustrated that she felt the need to practically beg him to trust her; although it’s possible she had done nothing to betray his trust (of course, I also realize there is a chance she has).  I wondered why we spend so much of our time in relationships attempting to build trust with the other.  I mean, why can’t we go into each relationship with a blind trust?  Why do we allow people who have betrayed our trust impede our future relationships?

Then, I had a thought.  One that seemed directly from the Lord…He just repeated what the girl had been saying: “If only you would let yourself trust Me.”  I had spent the time at the beach trying to come to terms and make sense of some big things going on in my life lately.  I felt the need to get some quality alone time with the Lord to get some answers.  But, really, why am I in such desperate need of answers?  Why do I let the decision about next year dominate my thoughts?  Why am I anxious about work, my weight, my commitments, and life in general?  All of these worries are direct reflections of the fact I am not putting all of my trust in Him.  I am attempting to take things upon myself and that is where the stress comes in.  I cannot handle it all.  The beauty is, He can.  Now, if only I can allow myself to trust Him unapologetically.  Completely.  Entirely.  Totally.  Thoroughly. 

See, being nosey can have its positives afterall!


About KarolynK

Hey there! Thanks for checking out my blog! My name is Karolyn (as you probably know) and I live in San Diego with my amazing Husband. I've been teaching Special Education for the bast six years and LOVE it! I am loving life and just trying to figure out if I'm doing what it is that God is wanting me to do....always a process! Thanks for sharing in this journey with me though, I really do appreciate it.

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