And in some ways it feels like yesterday…and in other ways, it seems like the six years it has been. People have said you never truly get over death, you just learn how to cope, how to change your life, how to assimilate to a life without people who have taken a part of your heart with them. Over the past six years, there has been a lot of change in my life. After losing Kisha, I was devastated. Distraught. It was a pain I would never wish upon anyone, although I have way too many people in my life who can empathize with the untimely loss of loved one. In spite of all of this, God is good. He is faithful, He is merciful, He is true. The Bible says that, ‘in this, you rejoice, even if now for a little while you have had to suffer various trials, so that the genuineness of your faith – being more precious than gold that, though perishable, is tested by fire – may be found to result in praise and glory and honor when Jesus Christ is revealed.’ I cannot say I have always rejoiced – meaning chosen joy over and over again in spite of all of this. But, the Lord has brought me to a place where I can be grateful for the friendship I had the opportunity to share with Kisha and where I can be grateful for all I learned from her through her life and her devastating death.
I heard a song the other day that rang true and brought tears to my eyes:
As her anniversary has drawn closer, the Lord has done an incredible job in encouraging me. A few noteworthy things:
1. From Beth Moore’s ‘So Long, Insecurity’:
“God has promised that His grace will be given according to our need and that not only will we survive by the skin of our teeth, if we trust Him and hang on to Him for dear life – grieving, yes, but as those who have hope – we will also thrive again. We can give ourselves to something greater than painlessness. We can give ourselves to purpose. If we cooperate, good will indeed to come to us and others around us, and glory will most assuredly come to God. Otherwise, He would have forbidden the tragedy. Those of us who are in Christ will also spend eternity with the loved ones who have shared our faith, and this life will seem like a vapor in comparison.
Romans 8:18 promises that the future we ahve coming is so glorious that nothing we’ve suffered will compare to the magnitude and splendor of it.’
2. A few months ago, I wrote a post on the plant I got from her mom from her funeral (read it here). During that time that day when He was so clearly using the plant to speak to me, I remember vividly hearing God promise that He would bring a bloom by her birthday. Now, let me tell you, this plant has not bloomed in almost two years. And I was a little skeptical. After the rabbit attack, the plant just wasn’t the same. UNTIL TWO DAYS AGO!!! As I went to water the plant, there it was. Still hidden to the untrained eye. But, upon closer inspection, very clearly a BLOOM!!! This was a promise I received in January!! And, I’m so grateful that I wrote it in a journal to go back and be reminded. God is so faithful.
3. For more information surrounding the details of her death and how intimately the Lord was involved in each detail – not that it was His heart to have this happen, but for whatever reason, it was allowed to happen – you can read the post from last year here and the one from the previous year here. Through all that happened, He offered His protection and extended His love and mercy to me, her family, and friends that were all left broken after losing her.
If you did know Kisha personally, please post your favorite memory. Maybe you didn’t know her, but have somehow been impacted by her life and what God did through that…please post that too. If you are on facebook, please join the group ‘In Memory of LaKisha Gentry’.